Wednesday, August 31, 2005

A Humanitarian Issue?


I'm reading a number of blogs (I won't say which ones) written by gay men that are writing about Katrina and the castastrophe in 4 states.

These particular blogs run along the lines of:

>> I will NOT donate anything to The American Red Cross because they are anti-gay. They must be anti-gay because their policy is to never accept blood donations from gays and lesbians.

>> I will NOT donate relief money or volunteer my time for Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama or Florida because those states don't allow same-sex marriage. They don't accept me as God made me, so fu*k them.

Any thoughts?

Hollywood Squares

If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were spontaneous and clever, not scripted and (often) dull, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep.
Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No. Wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Reality makes me uncomfortable

It's still way too early for the news to come out, but ...

Hurricane Katrina has devastated the oil industry that is centered in southern Louisiana. A large number of crude oil refineries are there. Pipelines from offshore run through the Ports of Fourchon and Venice. Both of these small communities were ravaged by the storm. They may have been destroyed.

Most of the hundreds of supply boats use those ports, as well as inland ports in Morgan City and Houma. These boats are absolutely critical to operations offshore. Without them, nothing happens.

Hopefully, after the reports on the losses of life and property in New Orleans, Biloxi and Mobile, the media will let us know about the longer-term effect on all of us because of the loss of these ports. I can tell you this: as a nation, we will immediately become even more dependent on foriegn oil than ever before. This is not good, of course, but is is a fact.

Whatever you may currently think about our involvement in the Middle East, you may want to give it a second thought. At least until alternative fuels are developed and marketed. And that ain't gonna happen overnight.

Hung out to dry

Monday, August 29, 2005

Of course, I drink. I'm an alcoholic!

Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusvie that, while they admit it is injurious, the cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks --- drinks which they see others taking with impunity.

"... their alcoholic life seems the only normal one."
This was soooooooo me. I accepted early in my 32 year drinking career that I was an alcoholic. By doing this, I could justify any and all drinking. Whenever, wherever, and however much I drank.

Sound familiar?

Ain't she luscious!?

She says she's 67 and I don't know why anyone would overstate their chronological years.

Please meet luscious lajuana.
Another Houstonian in recovery.

She actually came and listened when
I had a whole hour to speak about myself.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Freedom & Happiness

Our drinking was connected with many habits - big and little. Some of them were thinking habits, or things we felt inside ourselves. Others were doing habits - things we did, actions we took. In getting used to not drinking, we have found that we needed new habits to take the place of those old ones.


Except for the 4 years I worked, during my last 10 years of drinking I was usually at home or at the bar. All my friends were at the bar. All of them. I knew nobody else.

When I began attending AA meetings, I met new people. Made new friends. People who didn't drink, yet were happy. People who talked about ways to change my life. They said change didn't have to hurt. But I continued to drink for another 3 months because I was afraid. Afraid to stop. I couldn't imagine what my life would be like if I stopped. But I knew where it was going if I didn't stop.

I finally did stop when I asked my HP to help me. The lifelong craving/obsession was removed from me.

I went to AA meetings every day; often twice each day. But I still went to the bar every day. I just didn't drink alcohol; I changed from rum & coke to Cranberry juice. The bar was a habit and I thought the people there were my friends.

It was about the time I worked Step 9, with my sponsor, that my sober life took a new turn. I cleaned up the wreckage of my past (the best I possibly could) and I finally stopped going to the bar. It was no longer any fun. I have not been back since and have not missed it for one minute.

The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous tells us that after working the first 9 steps, our lives will change; the Promises will begin to be realized. This was certainly true in my case. The 1st Promise reads ...

"We will know a new freedom and happiness."

I'll go along with that.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Those damn dishes

Hey yall!! Meet Julie!

She hates doing the dishes and has named her blog,
"How to avoid washing the dishes"

Thar She Blows

Stay updated on Hurricane Katrina by CLICKING HERE
--- most recent satellite loop ---

Strong Beer

As if there aren't enough alcoholic concoctions on the market already, a Boston brewer introduces one that promises to bring more newcomers into AA.

The new beer - at 25% alcohol - is six times more powerful than a normal beer and twice the strength of a bottle of wine.
And at $40 a bottle, Samuel Adams Utopias is also among the world's most expensive.
Just 8,000 of the limited edition 24 oz tipple, sold in a copper kettle, have been brewed by the Boston Beer Company.
Brewery founder Jim Koch said the beer was designed to be enjoyed slowly as an after dinner tipple.
He said: "We are passionate about brewing quality, one-of-a-kind beer that amazes beer lovers and aficionados alike."

Friday, August 26, 2005

Powerless & Unmanageable

New to recovery? From alcohol? From other drugs or addictions?
The key to working a Twelve Step program is ...... working the Twelve Steps.

Step One reads something like this ...
"We admitted we were powerless over alcohol -- that our lives had become unmanageable."

Besides reading AA literature, try answering these questions, just for yourself.


Generate a list of healthy distractions and use these to help manage addictive urges. Have exercise head the list. In addition to satisfying physical cravings by activating the brain's mesolimbic dopamine system, it is almost impossible to smoke, drink, eat, shop, gamble, shoot-up, or what have you while lifting weights, taking step-aerobic class, running, swimming, bike riding, or playing racquet sports.

Other less strenuous activities can include:

... cleaning up or puttering around your home
... gardening, yard work, or repotting plants
... washing and waxing your car
... painting and other decorating projects
... pursuing a hobby that requires a significant level of concentration (ie: model-building, crossword puzzles) or one involving meditative and potentially relaxing repetition (ie: needle crafts, furniture refinishing)
... bathing the dog -- if you really need distraction, try bathing the cat!
... singing or playing an instrument -- consider joining a community orchestra or chorus
... doing volunteer work with a physical component (ie: joining Habitat for Humanity, walking dogs for the local animal shelter, cooking and serving at a soup kitchen, doing Twelve Step work at the county detox center)
... reading, especially magazines you can't afford to buy, at the public library

from STAYING SOBER, Meredith Gould, pages 21,22
Tips for working a Twelve Step Program of Recovery

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Gifts from the East

Because I won a silly little blog-test a couple of weeks ago, JJ sent me these gifts. I am sooooo underserving, but will keep and use them anyway because one of my littany of character defects includes greediness.
... "The Book of Answers" hell, I don't even know the questions
... "Evil Thoughts" a collection of 22 unique postcards
... a pink feather boa (for a future hAAlf-nAAked thursdAAy foto)
... a parking permit to the Cape Cod Nude Beach (somehow, I think this may have been sent by mistake and will return it if asked coyly)
... a darling kitty kat card

Thanks JJ, you're much too sweet. But that often happens in sobriety.

hAAlf-nAAked thursdAAy

Sometimes, we all need a hand.
Today, I humbly offer mine in service.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Chilled to the bone

This is an email I received today from a friend in recovery. It's longer than my usual posts, but I believe it's worth reading. I asked for his permission to copy, paste and post it here (and I received it LOL).

Good very early in the morning everyone. Well, I hope that you are having a rich cup of coffee and that you have had your moment of meditation. You will need it if you decide to read through this monologue. I have to talk. You may choose not to read this. I will understand, because it will be long by the time I finish. You who are receiving this know me well enough to know that I have no need for drama and that I prefer that the attention stay off of me. I do not want to be recognized. I do not want to be anyone’s model for sobriety, spirituality, or how to effectively and successfully live life. So, you know that what I am about to disclose is coming directly from what I have just experienced. My mind is going over and over it in replays, so I need to get it out of me and I need for me to get out of my head so that I can go on, relax, and be ready to face the day.

It is now 5:15 am as I begin to write this.

I woke up about an hour ago in a sweat; yet chilled to the bone. I am slightly trembling. Confused and bewildered, I became aware of the deep sense of shame and feeling of disgust and guilt that clung to the inner part of my being. Sluggishly, I sat up upon the bed and gradually folded over into a fetal position. I am desperately hung-over and physically ill. My mind began to take over, posing one question and one thought after another: “What have I done?” “How could I have placed myself in a situation that would lead me down this path?” “How am I going to get through this with any sense of integrity?” "Why did I have to revert back to my self-sabotaging behavior?” "I will be shunned and rejected again.“ “My life is really over this time.” “I hate myself passionately.”

My mind raced to a remembrance of me waking up from a sleep as I had laid my head down on the bar. As I raised my head to wake, the bartender gently smiled (I remembered that he had invested a lot of time flirting with me prior to my nap on the bar) and said, “Hey babe, I am glad you slept a bit. You needed it. Here you go, you will need this.” I sleepily stretched my arms over my head, brushed my hand through my hair, rubbed my eyes, and with a smile reached my hand towards the flirtatious bartender to take from him what was to be the last drink. As I drank the last drink, I realized where I was and keenly became aware of what I had done. I put the shot class down and raced out of the bar into the streets. As I began to wonder aimlessly towards my car, I found a quiet place of solitude, sat down, and began to sob. I knew that I had failed. I was thinking and feeling that I would not be able to go back to AA or ever face the people who have embraced me, those who have been there for me, those who have cared for me. I will forever be disconnected from my children. My life is over. I found my car and drove home. I went to bed. I woke up about an hour ago in a sweat; yet chilled to the bone.

It was a crazy-ass dream.

Two days ago, my neighbor stopped me in a conversation and brought to my attention that for several days I have made reference to drinking. He asked me “What is going on. Are you seriously considering drinking?” I paused and replied “No. But for some reason it has been at the forefront of my thought lately.” I told him that I actually spoke about it last week in a meeting. I was hoping by doing so that I would be released from the thoughts and that I could move on. Well, the thoughts are there, still.

My assessment: my brevity with sobriety and AA has given me at least a bit of insight as to what my mind is going through. I am experiencing some anxiety about my 18 months milestone. I can only suppose that part of my fear is experiencing the success and like in the past when I got so close to success I began to engage in self-sabotage. Fear of achievement. Fear of going through the public recognition process and of being setup as a public model of goodness. Fear of not fulfilling the expectation of what others have of me, of being what a good model should be. Fear of being found out that I am not so good after all… that I am… on and on and on and on and on and on.

So, this morning I choose to embrace this fear. It is what it is. It is neither good, nor is it bad. It just is. I feel it. I own it as part of the person that I am. I fully experience it. I accept it for what there is to learn from it. I release it to my loving, kind, tender-hearted and understanding God who embraces me with all of his compassion.

Thanks for reading. Thanks for being there and for caring.

What will they think of next?

I simply must get me one of these.

Looks like a very efficient time saver.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

The 666 Club

pat robertson.
Need I say more?

Adventures not on TV

I love to watch adventure-type documentaries on TV. Films on the National Geographic Channel and A&E are likely places to find these. (by the way -- I finally saw "March of the Penguins"; I highly recommend it)

While watching one of these the other night called "Amazon Abyss" I thought, "I would never want to be there, doing what those guys are doing. Way too dangerous for me."

Then I suddenly realized that most of my life has been an adventure, of some sort or another. Of course, it was usually on my terms, in places I wanted to be. I just never thought of those times as adventures. They were just the way I lived. Things like ...

... a hundred times walking around London by myself, in search of the perfect pub
... late-night walks in cities in Morocco, The Congo, Gabon and other African countries by myself, in search of the perfect pub
... crawling home after 8, 10 & 12 hour binges at Griff's, my perfect pub in Houston
... walking the floor at gay bath-houses at two o'clock in the morning, usually in a blackout
... having public sex outside of a bar in a small, port town in Mexico with several Federalis in sight (the national police force has no sense of humor about those kinds of things)
... being drunk out of my mind late one night at a small, dark, sidewalk bar in Rio de Janiero where no other soul spoke English
... finding myself alone on a dirt road on the outskirts of Dakar, Senegal; too drunk to find my way home and no way to get there even if I knew how
... that was so much fun, I repeated that in a number of other places too over the years (I think)

Hmmmmmmm ... there seems to be a theme here.

Monday, August 22, 2005

Gasoline Prices

Big Brother

It's not perfect, but this site hits way too close to home, as it were.

Click on one of the major cities listed. Type in your address.
Chances are about 50/50 that your home or business will be
PICTURED!! Not just a map service, but a picture! Lovely.

courtesy of

There goes the credibility (again)

Here's a reason why I don't listen to any more TV news than I have to.

Friday morning, on a local Houston station, KHOU-TV (channel 11), there was a report about a tornado and the major damage it had caused on Thursday. At the end of the short report, the news presenter said that "there are even reports that the tornado overturned an 18-wheeler on the highway outside of town."

OK. This report was more than 12 hours after the tornado had done its thing. I am left to infer from their coverage that they"heard" about the 18-wheeler, but have not taken the initiative to cofirm it. But they will report it as news, just in case it really happened.

How much hard-nose, in-depth investigative reporting would it have taken to confirm this elusive fact?

Maybe a phone call?

Sunday, August 21, 2005


Saturday night I attended a charity fundraiser. I failed to get photos of everyone involved, but here's what I DID get.

Juan Pedro sang an original song he wrote about his girlfriend.
It was beautifully written and sounded great.

Brandy and Amy did a number as the crowd of 100 settled in for the show.

Ada did a GREAT number on the keyboards.
She's the daughter of a friend.
She also won 3rd place for her performance.

Lots of beautiful music so far.
The queens on hand were getting restless, however.

If they were mellow up until now,
ZANE woke them up!!

Zane has a spirit that can't be contained.
Neither could his bananas.

He peeled off his dress and showed off his physique until we just couldn't take it any more.

He won 1st place.

But there was one more act to follow.

Ricky wrapped up the evening with a touching rendition of "Breathe."

He took 2nd place in the audience judging.

It was a fun night and over $1000 was raised in an hour for our recovery center.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Interview with a Nut (case)

Godless Mom has a few questions for me. Designed just for me after reading my blog for some time and geting to know me, in print.
I'll do my best.

1. If you were to remove all but 5 people from the Baseball Hall of Fame, who would you leave?
Great question. It leaves me to ponder who are my 5 most favorite baseball heroes. Those 5 men who I consider to be not only the best, but most important people to the game. Here they are, in no particular order ...
(one) Babe Ruth -- no-brainer; he set the standards for all to follow
(two) Roberto Clemente -- the best and most complete player I've ever set my eyes on and he gave his life while helping other less fortunate
(three) Jackie Robinson -- a fabulous player who had the balls to break the color barrier
(four) Bob Gibson -- the finest pitcher I've ever seen
(five) Ted Williams -- the finest, most complete hitter the game has ever seen

NOTE: I had to leave Pete Rose out of this because he has chosen to first, cheat, then lie about his criminal involvement in betting against his own sport. His continued denial and lack of honesty has prevented him from gaining entry into The Hall of Fame. I think he was a better hitter than Ted Williams.

2. As someone who has travelled extensively you are probably more qualified than most to answer this question. What is the most beautiful place on our planet?
The most breath-taking site I've seen (yet) was from a 747, flying north-to-south over the Swiss Alps at 35,000 feet. The skies were clear on a cold winter day. Those massive mountains which looked relatively small, covered with whiteness from top to bottom. Green patches of fields and narrow blue rivers below. I'll never forget the beauty I saw that day which lasted for nearly an hour as I looked out my small window.

NOTE: I have more, but was asked for just one answer.

3. As an artist what inspires you or triggers in you the need to paint?
I took up painting earlier this year. I live in a 3-story townhouse which has staircases on one side of the building, leading up 2 flights. I needed some art to fill up all that wall space. I searched a number of places but everything I liked was out of my price range. A friend in recovery (an interior designer) suggested I create my own art. So I decided to give it a try without a clue as to how to get started. I got some canvasses and spray paint and have now produced 29 pieces. I've yet to pick up a brush.

4. What is your favorite Houston restaurant and what dish would you recommend?
Not a good question for this Texas boy. I'm a meat & potatoes guy. Don't eat fish, asian foods, burned out on chicken. My all-time favorite meal is Chicken-Fried Steak with potatoes (mashed or baked). The best I've had was DIRTY'S on Durham Street. It's no longer there. Coming in a close second is Mexican food. We call it Tex-Mex here and it's much better than in Mexico. My favorite venue for this was LEO'S MEXICAN RESTAURANT (on S. Shepherd, then moved to Washington Ave.), also out of business. Leo's was open from 1942-2000, when they finally closed down. Today, I like to get my Chicken-Fried steak @ KELLY'S COUNTRY COOKING on Park Place @ I-45.

5. If you were to fall in a vat of toxic waste or get bitten by a genetically modified mosquito what two super powers would you hope to develop?
What a question! hmmmmm ... I'll divorce my need for a Higher Power and spirituality out of this answer. Physically, I'd like to possess the power to eradicate Cancer from within -- CancerKiller. The other, more complete power would be to copy the fictional and magical powers of Samantha Stevens, of Bewitched. Just twitch my nose and all would be well.

Ahead of his time ...

Friday, August 19, 2005


Meet RICKY!!! Say hi to him.
Let him know you support him.
Ricky's been in the program since last August and has done just
about everything asked of him. He's been involved in lots of
service work during this first year in his new life. When Ricky
shares in a meeting, I listen carefully. He has a lot to say.

This picture was last Halloween.

Ricky has the
highly important

As usual, I'm in pristine white.

Drug Problem

(this is not my original writing; I don't know the author)

The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a Methamphetamine lab had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining county and he asked me a rhetorical question, ''Why didn't we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?''

I replied: "I had a drug problem when I was young:

I was drug to Church on Sunday morning.

I was drug to church for weddings and funerals.

I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the weather.

I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults.

I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher or the preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best effort in everything that was asked of me.

I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profane four-letter word.

I was drug out to pull weeds in mom's garden and flower beds and Cockleburs out of dad's fields.

I was drug to the homes of family, friends, and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop some firewood; and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.

Those drugs are still in my veins; and they affect my behavior in everything I do, say, and think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack, or heroin; and, if today's children had this kind of drug problem, America would be a better place."

Gay Bar

to tell
if you
are in a
gay bar.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

hAAlf nAAked thursdAAy


a few of my
bloggers are
posting pix
today ...

JJ (she started this whole mess) Scott (decided to go along with it)
Grace (couldn't resist the temptation) Steph (young & wise)
Blue (will she or won't she?) Sirreen (can she breast her last effort?)
PV (a leg, an arm, what's next?) Particle (sublime fotography)
Suzie (all the way from Ohio!) Pat (the newcomer)
Sage Grouse (Toronto forever!)

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

The Flasher

3 old ladies named Gertrude, Maude and Tilly were sitting on a park bench having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached from across the park.

The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them and opened his trench coat.

Gertrude immediately had a stroke.
Then Maude also had a stroke.
But Tilly, bless her heart, being older and more feeble, couldn't reach that far.

Please Validate Me

For 20 years, I had a great career. I worked hard. And I worked good.

I did the best I could, although a few times my alcoholism got in the way. But not often. I have to assume that I did a pretty decent job because the 2 companies I worked for sent me to remote countries, to oversee projects that pulled in $2 - $3 million per month.

I rarely got raises in salary (it seems the industry was continually in a downturn, thus that excuse became boring). I never got promoted. I didn't even get evaluated, which was company policy. The excuse for that was because I was always out of the country and not available for one-on-one evaluation (that was a bunch of B.S.). Probably the reason I kept my job was because I was willing to go to these far-off places for extended and undetermined lengths of time, by myself. So I drank all I wanted to drink.

On one hand, it was a fantastic job for a practicing alkie. Pretty much work my own hours as long as the job got done. I could even drink when I was working, most of the time. I was by myself. No one looking over my shoulder. So I drank more.

On the other hand, I am a sensitive person. Most alcoholics and addicts are. I always knew I was doing a good job, but I couldn't even get a pat on the back. Little or no recognition. I needed that reassurance and never got it. So I drank more.

I wonder if there's any connection between never being validated and being an alcoholic.
Today, I don't need another person to validate me. That's now just between me and my HP.

Pyramid Scheme

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Bill Gates inbox

CLICK HERE to get a glimpse of The Man's email inbox.

courtesy of this guy

Being Selfish

Alcoholics and addicts are typically considered to be very selfish. Meaning that we tend to place ourselves and our own feelings and happiness, before any consideration of others.

I like to think that I've always placed others before me, but when I honestly sit down and look at my behaviours over the years, that certainly is not always the case. I have learned that I can't make this correction in my thinking by myself. I need help. I pray each night that God (as I understand Him) remove my shortcomings that keep me from doing His will. My thinking alone tells me to do my will, not His.

A situation occurred yesterday that painfully pointed out my selfishness to me. I was with my elderly mother and was ready to leave. I wanted to do what I wanted to do. She wanted me to stay a little longer to help her with a financial matter. I almost "lost it." But only in my mind. I caught my faulty thinking BEFORE I verbalized anything that would have been quite hurtful to her. I realized that it wouldn't hurt me one friggin' bit to stick around a little longer.

This, my friends, is the magic of recovery.

Even though I can't always control my flawed thinking, I can control my behaviour. Because of this improvement, today I don't have an amends to make. And today, I am still happy and sober.

Progress. Not perfection.

Monday, August 15, 2005

a very GAY reception

Two good friends, Doug and Rob, got married on June 30th in Toronto. A LEGAL marriage!! Because of other commitments, they didn't have their reception here in Houston until yesterday.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Bush Sandwich

Ooops,. got tagged (again)

Phil got tagged, now he's tagged me.

10 Years Ago Today:
I was living back in Houston and had been semi-retired for 2 years. Spent most of my days and nights drinking at Griff's Inn. I also umpired amateur and semi-pro baseball games, then went to Griff's Inn afterward. Occasionally did yard work at my mother's house.

Five Years Ago:
I was working in Newfoundland (NE Canada). Spent 4 months there getting to know the people. I worked hard, but played hard too. St John's is famous for having more bars per capita than any city in North America. I felt right at home.

1 Year Ago:
Three weeks shy of my first AA birthday. Atending 14-17 AA meetings every week. Reluctantly looking for employment. Was feeling pretty much happy, joyous and free after working the 12 steps and recently putting closure to my former relationship. Learning to enjoy a new way of life.

Attended my 2 AA meetings at 8:30am and 8:00pm. In between, spent a few hours with my mother on business issues and a little yard work. Of course, spent my obligatory 2 or 3 hours on the computer, as well.

Will attend 2 AA meetings, as usual. I get to take my mother to a doctor appointment in the morning. My Higher Power fills in the rest of my hours for me, if I so choose to allow Him/Her.

5 Snacks I Enjoy:
1. Cheetohs
2. Fritos
3. Chocolate Chip Cookies
4. Cinammon Rolls
5. Cream Soda

5 Bands That I Know the Lyrics to Most of Their Songs:
1. Beach Boys
2. The Beatles
3. The Eagles

5 Things I Would Do with $100,000,000:
1. create Foundation for people in recovery from alcohol
2. donate $$$$ to those left homeless from fire
3. invest in a down-home restaurant
4. design and build my dream home
5. set-up my 2 nephews in business

5 Locations I Would Like to Run Away to:
Like Phil, I am quite happy where I am. Why change it?
I've been just about everywhere I want go already.

5 Bad Habits I Have:
1. smoking
2. taking others' inventory
3. smoking
4. drinking too much coffee
5. smoking

5 Things I Like Doing:
1. going to AA meetings
2. helping my mother
3. service & charity work
4. spending time on my computer
5. trying to work AA's 12-steps

5 Things I Would Never Wear:
1. tattoo
2. a piercing
3. a hairpiece
4. high heels
5. previously driven condom

5 TV Shows I Like(d):
1. Dick van Dyke Show
2. Andy Griffith Show
3. Seinfeld
4. Everybody Loves Raymond
5. All in the Family

5 Movies I Like:
1. Blues Brothers
2. Star Trek - The Motion Picture
3. It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World
4. Cat Ballou
5. The Gardener

5 Famous People I Would Like to Meet:
1. Abraham Lincoln
2. Nelson Mandella
3. Bob Hope
4. Roberto Clemente
5. Sir Richard Branson

5 Biggest Joys at the Moment:
1. being sober
2. my mother
3. my home and its environment
4. my friends in AA, old and new
5. that I am still alive

5 Favorite Toys:
1. computer
2. digital camera
3. Rav4
4. TV
5. my 3 cats?

5 People to Tag:
soberInsanity (new in recovery, wise beyond her years)
Kenny (cause he hates these things)
JJ (small payback for a nice gift)
R.J. (just to get his mind off his troubles)
Grace (to get her to blog more)

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Camel Spider

Click here. No explanation necessary.


CLICK HERE for your daily streching exercise.

Friday, August 12, 2005


Between 1990 and 2001, I worked in Nigeria (West Africa) 5 times. I guess I spent a total of about 2 years there.

It is Africa's most populous country with more than 120 million peoples. Nigeria is rich in natural resources. OIL is their main export, thus the chief source of revenue. Internally, it is also rich with a history of dictatorships and corruption.

The people I know there just want to live a good life and be happy. They want to work and provide for their families. No different than right here in Houston, Texas. Because of the political situation for so many decades, the infrastructure is minimal for a country so rich. They experienced the first democratically-elected President in 1997, when Mr Obasanjo came to power. A former Army General himself and part of the past corrupt processes, he has tried to make positive changes. But most of his efforts are thwarted by greedy politicians and businessmen.

Today, Nigeria stands at a turning point. As Nigeria goes, so will the rest of West Africa. It can go forward, or it can return to the dark days. They need outside help to make it work. Most Nigerians want it to work. It will take pressure from the rest of the world (not only the United States and Great Britain). But today, Nigeria is largely ignored. The results of that will be disastrous for Africa.

CLICK HERE to read one man's plea to President Bush for help and assistance.

Sad State of Affairs

You need a babysitter for the evening for your 9 year-old child. You only have 2 choices at this late moment. You must choose between a Catholic priest and Ozzie Osbourne as your babysitter.
Whom do you pick?

Thursday, August 11, 2005

half nAAked thursday

only for today, left ear on display

Borrowed from Sage

I borrowed this from Sage
(he borrowed it from Eric who borrowed it from Matt)

"Do you read me?"

"If you read me on a regular/semi regular basis, leave me a comment and let me know. Then post this in your blog and find out who reads you. You'll be surprised how many different people read you, and you never know who you might become friends with."

(thanks Sage)

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Houston from Space

That's Galveston Bay at the bottom.

Coping with Anger

Few people have been more victimized by resentments than we alcoholics. A burst of temper could spoil a day, and a well-nursed grudge could make us miserably ineffective. Nor were we ever skillful in separating justified from unjustified anger. As we saw it, our wrath was always justified. Anger, that occasional luxury of more balanced people, could keep us on an emotional jag indefinitely. These "dry benders" often led straight to the bottle.

Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen. We must avoid quick-tempered criticism, furious power-driven argument, sulking, and silent scorn. These are emotional booby traps baited with pride and vengefulness. When we are tempted by the bait, we should train ourselves to step back and think. We can neither think nor act to good purpose until the habit of self-restraint has become automatic.

I've always been a pretty laid-back guy. However, there were countless times during my drinking years that I lost my temper. Some might say I had a short temper. With a much greater clarity of mind (in sobriety) and through my attempts to live according to the Steps of AA and other "tools" I have learned in sobriety, I have not "lost it" since the day I stopped drinking. I really can't say that I've even been angry; disappointed, yes, but not really angry at anything, anyone or myself.


Tuesday, August 09, 2005

GAY Marriage

Grace, in the UK, has posted about gay marriage. CLICK HERE to visit her and post a comment. She's waiting to read your thoughts.


Since I've been sober, my dreams are far more intense. I often fall asleep quickly and almost immediately have some kind of a wild dream. The reason I know this is because I also wake up after that first dream; fifteen to thirty minutes after sleep first occurs. Then, it's easy to fall back asleep.

By far, the most recurring topic of my dreams is flying. Always has been, since I was a kid. More likely than not, that flying takes place inside of an airplane, a large plane such as a 747 or such. There are times when I am the airplane, sometimes threading my way through neighborhoods, avoiding trees and houses. Occasionally I witness a crash, standing a short distance away. I don't remember ever seeing dead or bloody bodies; the aircraft itself is the object of the dream.

But they seem so real.

How about you? What are your dreams made of?

Monday, August 08, 2005

The Beach

Keys of the Kingdom

I have had my share of problems, heartaches and disappointments because that is life, but also I have known a great deal of joy and a peace that is the handmaiden of an inner freedom. I have a wealth of friends and, with my A.A. friends, an unusual quality of fellowship. For, to these people, I am truly related. First, through mutual pain and despair, and later through mutual objectives and newfound faith and hope. And, as the years go by, working together, sharing our experiences with one another, and also sharing a mutual trust, understanding, and love --- without strings, without obligation --- we acquire relationships that are unique and priceless.

There is no more aloneness, with that awful ache, so deep in the heart of every alcoholic that nothing, before, could ever reach it. That ache is gone and never need return again.

Now there is a sense of belonging, of being wanted and needed and loved. In return for a bottle and a hangover, we have been given the Keys of the Kingdom.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Good to be the Boss

Senior Moments

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.

The two gentlemen were talking, and one said: "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly." The other man said: "What is the name of the restaurant?"

The first man thought and thought and finally said: "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know the one that's red and has thorns?" "Do you mean a rose?" "Yes, that's the one," replied the man.

He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled: "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Bloggers Fired !!

It was only a matter of time. CLICK HERE.

Remember, you're not allowed to express your own opinion.
This is America. Not communist China.


If GH can stand for P as in Hiccough,
And if OUGH stands for O as in Dough,
And if PHTH stands for T as in Phthisis,
And if EIGH stands for A as in Neighbor,
And if TTE stands for T as in Gazette,
If EAU stands for O as in Plateau,

Then the right way to spell POTATO could be:



Friday, August 05, 2005

Victory, once again

Please visit soberInsanity and read her tales of the day.
It's both of her posts for today, Friday, August 5, 2005.

Character Defects

Here's 2 columns of some of my character defects. This is the short list. In conjunction with Steps 6 & 7 of Alcoholics Anonymous, I ask God (as I understand Him) to remove these from me so that I may better do His will.

alibis and excuses .......................................... anger
arrogance ........................................................ bad attitude
blaming others ............................................... cheating
controlling ....................................................... being critical
defiant .............................................................. dishonesty
envy ................................................................. fearful
gluttony ........................................................... grandiosity
greed ................................................................ hateful
hypocritical ..................................................... impatient
inconsiderate .................................................. insensitive
intolerant ........................................................ irresponsible
jealous ............................................................. judgemental
know it all ....................................................... lazy
lust ................................................................... lying
manipulative .................................................. need to be right
negative thinking ........................................... perfectionism
pettiness ......................................................... pride
physically abusive ......................................... procrastination
prone to gossip ............................................... punishing
pushy ............................................................... rationalization
regretful .......................................................... rude
self-deception ................................................. self-righteous
self-pitying ...................................................... selfish
sloth .................................................................. stealing
stubborn .......................................................... suspicious
talk too much .................................................. tardy
thoughtless ...................................................... uncooperative
unrealistic ......................................................... unteachable
unwilling ............................................................ vanity
verbally abusive .............................................. withdrawn


Thursday, August 04, 2005

I slept with a girl!

AM I GAY? Or what?

It was 1987.

I worked in the Houston office for a large corporation with international operations. One day my elderly boss told me to hand-deliver a job bid (in an envelope) to our man in Rio de Janiero. Brasil. (my boss didn't trust FedEx or UPS to get it there in time)

I already had a current business visa so the next day I was off. I was 33 years old and was met by my colleague, Paul (40 yrs old), at the Rio airport. I handed over the envelope to him and my duties were done. Complete. It was a Friday afternoon and he asked me to stay in town for the weekend and play tourist. He'd show me around the city. I didn't have much cash on me and he said not to worry; he'd take care of me. We had been good friends for years, since I began with the company.

The next night I met Paul's girlfriend, a young Brasilian beauty. He made arrangements for a double date so I could taste some of the local cuisine. Since I wasn't "out of the closet" at work, I could not find a way out of this. So his girlfriend brought along her best friend. The four of us ate dinner and made our way to a few bars. We wound up back at Paul's company apartment, in Ipanema. The four of us! Although I'd been drinking, I was in a near panic. I was expected to sleep with this girl. She was another gorgeous 20-ish Brasilian girl-of-the-night type. The spare bedroom had only a single bed. Not enough room to be side-by-side.

I was in my underwear and she undressed completely. I was really in a panic now. I did not want to have sex with this girl, beautiful as she was. I tried to tell her I just wanted to sleep; that I was too drunk. She didn't understand. I don't know if she didn't understand my English or just couldn't figure out why I was so aloof and indifferent. She did everything she could think of to excite me, but all her attempts were in vain. As the Chinese say after another politician is appointed, "No erection here today." Nothing happened. I just wanted to sleep. So we did.

If she'd only brought her twin brother ...

half nAAked thursday

Part of this blog is about recovery from my alcoholism.
Part of this blog is about a feeble attempt at humour.
I'm not too sure what this is about, but I ain't the only one doing it! As a result of a very dubious typed agreement (non-binding), we have agreed to post half-nAAked pictures of ourselves one time per week. See these guys too ...

JJ Doughgirl Trudging Scott

Perfect Virgo nocomment Grace Blue

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Sure, of course ...

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day.

"In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."

A voice from the back of the room piped up,"Yeah, right!"

Fear + Courage = Faith

When our failings generate fear, we then have soul-sickness. This sickness, in turn, generates still more character defects.

Unreasonable fear that our instincts will not be satisfied drives us to covet the possessions of others, to lust for sex and power, to become angry when our instinctive demands are threatened, to be envious when the amibitons of others seem to be realized while ours are not. We eat, drink and grab for more of everything than we need, fearing we shall never have enough. And, with genuine alarm at the prospect of work, we stay lazy. We loaf and procrastinate, or at best work grudgingly and under half steam.

These fears are the termites that ceaselessly devour the foundations of whatever sort of life we try to build.

As faith grows, so does inner security. The vast underlying fear of nothingness commences to subside. We of A.A. find that our basic antidote for fear is a spiritual awakening.
A.A. GRAPEVINE, January 1962

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Prostate Exam

I had an emissions test done this morning.
Next, I'll have one done on the car.

Trust the Pilot

Passengers on a small commuter plane are waiting for the flight to leave. They’re getting a little impatient, but the airport staff assures them that the pilots will be there soon, and the flight can take off. The entrance opens, and two men dressed in Pilots’ uniforms walk up the aisle. Both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the other is tapping his way up the aisle
with a cane. Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up.

The passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster down the runway, and the people at the windows realize that they’re headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport territory. As it begins to look as though the plane will plow into the water, panicked screams fill the cabin. At that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.

The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon all retreat into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands. In the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they’re gonna scream too late, and we’re all gonna die."

On the Wall

After rearranging some furniture around the house, I had a blank wall space. So I painted this over the weekend to fill that space.

Monday, August 01, 2005


Protecting Ignorant Christians From Homosexual Predators


courtesy of those informed folks at Landover Baptist Church
who are kind enough to illustrate how gay people are out to corrupt
all children.

Also, on their site:
How to Organize Book Burnings
Harry Potter Action Alert
God's obsession with excrement
God Told Me to Hate You
and much, much more!!