Acceptance, Faith and Action

How to Cope When Life Lands a One-Two Punch?

Maybe you got fired, you can't find a job, your bank account is overdrawn, and life looks hopeless. Maybe you or your family is suffering a health crisis, or your spouse left your long-term-marriage. Whatever the specifics, when they attack, troubles seem to gang up on you. One problem leads to another until you feel your world is ending. The loss of job, health, or marriage leads to loss of financial security, and any sort of crisis leads to emotional depression. How to cope when life lands a one-two punch?

Respond to the crisis with a three-phase counter-attack:

1. Acceptance: Before you can recover from a crisis, you have to acknowledge that the devastation before your eyes is real. When life broadsides you, your first instinct is to look at the flaming crumpled wreck in disbelief and think, "This isn't real, this can't have just happened." But it did happen, and you can't move back the hands of time and ask the director for take-two. This isn't a movie, it's your real life. As William Shakespeare said, "What's done is done."

True acceptance requires giving up all resentments and regrets. Blame is not going to fix anything. Screaming at your ex-boss or ex-husband or sticking pins in their voodoo doll isn't going to change your situation, and it will make you feel even more upset.

The key to acceptance is forgiveness of everyone, especially yourself, for everything that has ever occurred. Forgiveness is for yourself - so you can release yourself from the fires of anger and hatred that will otherwise burn your spirit to a cinder. Adopt an attitude of forgiveness - not so your ex-boss or ex-husband can sleep better, but so you can transform your own nightmares into sweet dreams.

2. Faith: If you are deeply religious, you know what this means. In any case, have faith in your own abilities and in your future.

3. Action: Acceptance and faith are important, but they are not enough. Believe in the future and don't worry, but also keep taking action.

When you get hit by a sequence of challenges, such as job loss, financial worries, and depression, you need to respond with all three: Acceptance, Faith, and Action.

by Jonathon Huie

Man vs Woman

Men Are Just Happier People

NICKNAMES

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman.

EATING OUT

When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

MARRIAGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

Note:  I didn't write this.  I just re-posted it to piss off a few of you.  LOL

Miles of Smiles

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for nothing serious today.  This is one of my all-time favorites:

Once upon a time,
in a land far away,

a beautiful, independent,

self assured princess

happened upon a frog as she sat,

contemplating ecological issues

on the shores of an unpolluted pond

in a verdant meadow near her castle.

A frog hopped into the princess’ lap

and said:  "Elegant Lady, I was once

a handsome prince, until an evil witch

cast a spell upon me.

One kiss from you, however, and I will

turn back into the dapper, young prince

that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry

and setup housekeeping in your castle

with my mother, where you can prepare my meals,

clean my clothes, bear my children,

and forever feel grateful and happy in doing so."

That night, as the princess dined sumptuously

on a repast of lightly sauteed frog legs

seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce,

she chuckled to herself and thought:

“I don’t fucking think so”

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
  - Oscar Wilde

and for today ........

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for the faith which I've acquired since I came into recovery.  Thanks, y'all.

for the people all around me who set such fine examples of Living Sober

that I no longer have to take on the problems of others (usually)

for this acronym I heard --- W.A.I.T. = why am I talking?


We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. 
The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.
- Joseph Campbell

duh!

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I try to remember not to give advice.  I do, however, have many suggestions.  LOL

that I found a way of life that suits my taste

that I am aware of having a very heavy heart these past few days.  I just don't have much to say; I prefer to listen and observe.  I guess it's grief and grieving for those who have lost their way in recovery and the few who have lost their very lives.  It shall pass.

Man should forget his anger before he lies down to sleep.

- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Thank You.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I have sooooooooooo much gratitude!!

If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.

- Meister Eckhart

Grateful to be sober

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

to be shown better ways of living

that it is really pretty easy to live properly; it takes no more effort than to live poorly

OK.

At the recovery center where I attend most of my AA meetings, we experienced a really tough week.
 On Monday, a 34 year-old guy died after battling liver cancer for the past 5 years.  He died sober.

On Wednesday a friend died from an overdose of inhalants.  He was a chronic relapser who at one time had 6 years sober, but over the past 10 years had many slips.  

On Friday, another close friend tried to commit suicide by shooting himself in the head.  He lies in critical condition today.  It's still too early to know if he'll survive.  If he does, he may have limited brain function.

On Saturday, a best friend of one of my sponsees died from an overdose.

Today, I'm grateful to be sober and have a defense against that first drink.  You know, the drink that will kill me.

The only limits in our life are those we impose on ourselves.

- Bob Proctor

Assuming ...

Assumptions and expectations are two of the biggest dangers to your emotional wellbeing.

Assumptions are beliefs that don't know they are beliefs. When one states a belief, that person understands that there are other possible beliefs - even if one is completely convinced that their belief is the "right" belief.

As an example, I believe that a progressive social agenda is best for the country, but I understand that other well-intentioned people believe that unfettered capitalism is best.

In contrast, an assumption is invisible. If someone says, "Los Angeles is a dangerous place to live," that might be shorthand for, "It is my personal belief that Los Angeles is a dangerous city," but it is more likely that, for that person, it is simply a fact that Los Angeles is dangerous. No other possibility has ever been considered.

Often people live with lifelong assumptions about what they are unable to do with their lives.

Could you run for public office? Could you write a book? Could you create an invention that made you an instant millionaire? Would you marry a person of a different race or religion? Would you leave your job and found your own company?

Consider your reactions to those questions. Do you thoughtfully consider questions of that sort? Or do you snap to judgement?

Assumptions are very limiting. You can live a more successful and joyful life if you are willing to question your assumptions, and to have an open mind toward all of life.

Understand that you can never be free of all assumptions - because they ARE invisible. But you can watch for them when they do show up, and stamp them out.

Porcelain Unicorn

another week gone by ...

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for reminders I've been privy to this week ..........

that life is much better sober than drunk

that I prefer to remember friends as they were when healthy (rather than on their death bed)

that newcomers to sobriety are some of my greatest teachers

that my best is good enough

that I absolutely must talk about what's on my mind or else I can blow anything out of proportion

A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer.

- Bruce Lee

Damn.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I'm sober.
that I'm alive.

Another friend died yesterday from this damn disease.  He was in the program on and off for about 15 years, but hasn't been sober for the past 3 or 4 years.  A wonderful man and father when he was sober.
I will keep good memories of his life, but learn more lessons from his death.

F_ _ k this damn disease.



Live with intention.
Walk to the edge.
Listen hard.
Practice wellness.
Play with abandon.
Laugh.
Choose with no regret.
Appreciate your friends.
Continue to learn.
Do what you love.
Live as if this is all there is.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Short, but sweet!

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for the 6:30am meeting I attend every M-F
for the stories we read in the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th edition).

Yesterday we read "Gutter Bravado" page 501.  Here's a paragraph that really speaks to me ........

"The meetings gave me what my sponsor likes to call one of the most important words in the Big Book:  A.A. put a "we" in my life.  "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol ...."   I no longer had to be alone.  Fellowship and activity kept me coming back long enough to work the Twelve Steps.  The more I did, the better I felt.  I started hanging out with my sponsor and some active people at the meetings.  They showed me how gratitude is something that is demonstrated, not talked about.  Gratitude is action."

that baseball season is just about upon us.  I'm ready!!!!!

Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are.

- Marianne Williamson

workin' it

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that my happiness does not depend on things going my way.  When I'm just able to go with the flow of life, I am usually quite serene, if not just downright happy.

for the honesty and courage of my recovery friends at the 6:30am meeting I attend every weekday.  It seems that we who regularly attend that meeting (1) are willing to do whatever it takes to stay sober  (2) are crazy.

for slow changes that occur to people in recovery; sometimes so subtle that it's not noticed until long after it happens.

Success is a state of mind.
If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success.

- Joyce Brothers

Welcome back!

A real police car.  It was seized in a drug raid and fitted out as a patrol vehicle.

todAAy i  AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I have no desire to drink alcohol today.  Again.

for an interesting weekend.  It seemed like a number of people were very irritable, to the point of being ugly to other people.  Because I seem to be spiritually fit, I didn't get involved but was able to watch from the sidelines.  I credit recovery tools I have acquired in both Alcoholics Anonymous and Al Anon.

for sponsees.  The spiritual and emotional experience I gain from working with others is absolutely priceless!

that I have no desire to drink alcohol today.  Again.  (did I already mention that?)

The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

- Dale Carnegie

How to Cope

Maybe you got fired, you can't find a job, your bank account is overdrawn, and life looks hopeless. Maybe you or your family is suffering a health crisis, or your spouse left your long-term-marriage. Whatever the specifics, when they attack, troubles seem to gang up on you. One problem leads to another until you feel your world is ending. The loss of job, health, or marriage leads to loss of financial security, and any sort of crisis leads to emotional depression. How to cope when life lands a one-two punch?

Respond to the crisis with a three-phase counter-attack:

1. Acceptance: Before you can recover from a crisis, you have to acknowledge that the devastation before your eyes is real. When life broadsides you, your first instinct is to look at the flaming crumpled wreck in disbelief and think, "This isn't real, this can't have just happened." But it did happen, and you can't move back the hands of time and ask the director for take-two. This isn't a movie, it's your real life. As William Shakespeare said, "What's done is done."

True acceptance requires giving up all resentments and regrets. Blame is not going to fix anything. Screaming at your ex-boss or ex-husband or sticking pins in their voodoo doll isn't going to change your situation, and it will make you feel even more upset.

The key to acceptance is forgiveness of everyone, especially yourself, for everything that has ever occurred. Forgiveness is for yourself - so you can release yourself from the fires of anger and hatred that will otherwise burn your spirit to a cinder. Adopt an attitude of forgiveness - not so your ex-boss or ex-husband can sleep better, but so you can transform your own nightmares into sweet dreams.

2. Faith: If you are deeply religious, you know what this means. In any case, have faith in your own abilities and in your future.

3. Action: Acceptance and faith are important, but they are not enough. Believe in the future and don't worry, but also keep taking action.

When you get hit by a sequence of challenges, such as job loss, financial worries, and depression, you need to respond with all three: Acceptance, Faith, and Action.

3-legged chicken

Juan was driving down a country lane in his pickup when suddenly a chicken darted into the road in front of him. He slammed on his brakes, but realized that the chicken was speeding off down the road at about 30 miles an hour. Intrigued, he tried to follow the bird with his truck, but he couldn't catch up to the accelerating chicken.

Seeing it turn into a small farm, Juan followed it. To his astonishment, he realized that the chicken had three legs. Looking around the small farm, he noticed that ALL of the chickens had three legs.

The farmer came out of his house, and Juan said, "Three-legged chickens? That's astonishing!"

The farmer replied, "Yep. I bred 'em that way because I love drumsticks."

Juan was curious. "How does a three-legged chicken taste?"

The farmer smiled. "Dunno. Haven't been able to catch one yet."


***** Now, go enjoy your Saturday.

so long, this week

Places I've been.  So far.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I don't have knee-jerk reactions.  I'm amazed at the "contempt prior to investigation" of some of my friends on Facebook regarding things in the news.  "Hang 'em!"  "Lock him up and throw away the key."  " He's a Democrat.  He can't be right."  "He's a Republican.  He sucks."

I don't have to over-react.  I can gather the facts first.  That usually eliminates the need to act or even think irressponsibly.  I can pause when agitated or disturbed.   Isn't this what recovery is about?

OK.  A friend with 23 years in recovery and is still very active with service work had a farewll party last night.  There were about 40 of us at his dinner.  He's moving back to West Hollywood after being in Houston 3 years.  What a fun time, being with so many real people.

As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way.- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Trying not to stand still

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I know, without any doubt, that I am not recovered from alcoholism.  I hope I never think that I am fully recovered.  I have no desire to drink alcohol and I have not had any desire since the last day I drank in 2003.  But I am still an alcoholic.  My thinking is still alcoholic.  I am NOT wired like a non-alcoholic.  As a result of these things, I will keep going to AA meetings, keep working with others and basically keep doing all the other things I do in recovery.  Why change?  It works.

Be not afraid of growing slowly,
be afraid only of standing still.

- Chinese Proverb

Funny how this works ......

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I'm still amazed that I wake up totally sober every morning

that I can no longer justify bad behavior (that doesn't mean I don't exhibit bad behavior at times)

that as my life became more manageable, I became a better person

that I'll trudge the road.  again.  today. 

We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant.

You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard

or just think it's going to get on by itself.

You've got to keep watering it.

You've got to really look after it and nurture it.

- John Lennon

For ...........

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for Step 6. 

for entirely ready.

for a defense against drinking.

for serenity (most of the time)

for newcomers who remind me

for old-timers who show me

for paved roads where I live

A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.

- Muhammad Ali

To the basics. To the basics.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I got another chance at life a few years ago, beginning with the first day I was sober

that I vividly remember how I felt after 30 days of being sober.  I felt then that I could do this thing.  I really could stay sober.

for slow spiritual development. I don't believe I could do it any quicker and still remain sane-ish.

for an afternoon spent with my newest sponsee, getting to know each other

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most fools do.

- Benjamin Franklin

Get Your Life Back!

What To Do When Your Whole World Is Falling Apart? 
6 Support Ideas To Stop Anxiety and Give You Back Your Life
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

What if you lost your job, your house burned down, the creditors were closing in, and your marriage had become hellishly confrontational? No, that's not make believe. That's the real life of a real person. How can you maintain a positive outlook under such stress and strain?

Six ways to find joy in the face of overwhelming circumstances:

1. Start by finding things for which to be grateful. Gratitude is crucial to your happiness. If you are reading this article, you are alive and your brain is functioning fairly well. Start your gratitude list with living, breathing, and thinking. Add every blessing, however tiny, to your list. Every moment without pain is a blessing, every bite of food, every bird, tree, and butterfly. Give thanks for every "hello," and every smile.

2. Give thanks, also, for the life lessons. Make a list of what you have learned - yes, a written list. Be grateful for each lesson. Life lessons often come at great cost, but they are priceless jewels.

3. Do you have a support system - friends and family you can confide in? If so, be very grateful, and use that network now. Don't be embarrassed to seek emotional support from those you respect and love. If you don't feel you have a support network, find one in your church or community, and be grateful for those who are willing to be of service.

4. Care for your body and spirit with special attention and gentleness in this time of great challenge. Several times each day, take a moment to breathe deeply and center yourself. Consider beginning yoga or qigong. Eat healthy, keep hydrated. Get enough sleep. If you have trouble sleeping, pay special attention to the rest of the ideas in this article, they will all help you sleep better.

5. Begin each day with a silent walk: Get up a half hour earlier to make time for it. While a walk in a natural setting is ideal, a walk on city streets will do fine. Thoughts, angers, resentments, and fears will form in your mind as you walk. That "mind chatter" is always with us whenever we are not focused on a specific mental activity, and it gets much stronger when we are stressed. Neither resent the mind chatter, nor let it linger. Say "thank you" to each passing thought, anger, resentment, or fear - then release it and return to your silent walk.

6. Release your angers, resentments, and fears by feeding your troubles and fears to the cleansing fire: Light a candle or small fire. Write one trouble or fear on a piece of paper, and feed it to the fire, while releasing the issue to Spirit. Repeat until you can no longer think of another issue that burdens you.

May your days be bright with joy and hope.

Happy Paddy's Day ........

Seamus and Paddy were on their way home from the pub, were stumblin up the country road in near darkness,

"Seamus, I think we've stumbled into the graveyard - look, I can see a stone here that says a man lived to 105!"

"Glory be Malarki, was it anybody we knew?"

"No, twas somebody named 'Miles from Dublin'"  

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.   Looking up to heaven he said, 'Lord take pity on me.   If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!' 
Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, 'Never mind, I found one.'

An Irish priest is driving down to  New York  and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut .   The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'

'Just water,' says the priest.

The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'

The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'

as we enter the weekend .........

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that it takes so little effort to be friendly

that I can go into this St Patrick's Day without the need or desire to drink or get drunk.

that I have less fear of life than I ever have

for all of my friends and acquaintances who have passed away before me.  They each meant something different to me, in their own way.  I bring this up because one died Wednesday and another may die today or tomorrow.  I accept their passing as God-given and I know it's not for me to take it personally but instead to accept and have compassion.

May God grant you always...
A sunbeam to warm you,
a moonbeam to charm you,
a sheltering Angel so nothing can harm you.
Laughter to you.
Faithful friends near you.
And whenever you pray,
Heaven to hear you.

- Irish Blessing

Acceptance. Always.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that this paragraph means so much to me that I'm taking the time to type it out this morning.  It's from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.  When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation -- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.  Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake.  Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy.  I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes."

Pretty much, when I can remember this concept, I'm a happy fella no matter what's going on.

The grass is not always greener
on the other side of the fence.
Fences have nothing to do with it.

The grass is greenest where it is watered.
When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.

- Anonymous

Just plain grateful

Ferrari engine

 

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I live in a city that has over 2000 AA meetings every week.  I'm lucky enough to attend 13 of them.

that it only took me 3 months of AA meetings to realize that alcohol was the problem, not the solution

that I have not had ONE temptation (yet) to drink or get drunk since I had a spiritual awakening in September 2003.  Ladies and Gentlemen, this is a Miracle!

that I am sure I'll stay completely free of all alcoholic beverages today 

Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished:
If you're alive, it isn't.

- Richard Bach

No-title Tuesday

1953 Hudson Hornet

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I'm slowly learning how to handle sobriety.  It begins by ..... not drinking.

for the trust that I learned how to give when I got a sponsor and proceeded through the steps.  Especially step 5.

that I'm not a fighter.  Neither physically nor verbally.  I see those who are and frankly, I just can't see any advantages in it.

The best time to make friends is before you need them.

- Ethel Barrymore

That busy third year .........

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for my first three years in recovery.  My partner had moved out of the house because of my wretched behavior.  He actually returned to his home country (in the Caribbean) to go back to school for post-graduate studies.  While we kept in touch, I was left to focus on my recovery program.  It developed just the way it was supposed to.  I became involved in everything at my recovery center and learned all about service work on many levels.  I was able to retire due to my Mom's illness and she turned over her income for me to handle.  At 3 years sober, she had a major stroke and I became her primary caretaker.  My partner also moved back to join me after finishing his degree.

that today, I love my life.  I am blessed to be alive and blessed to be sober.  How can I not give back to a program that gave me a new life?

The depth and strength of a human character are defined by its moral reserves.
People reveal themselves completely
only when they are thrown out of the customary conditions of their life,
for only then do they have to fall back on their reserves.

- Leon Trotsky

Don't Worry, Be Happy

How To Be Happy In Life - The 9 Paths To Happiness
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sometimes it appears that life throws more obstacles in our path than we can handle. However, even in the face of the most challenging circumstances, you can make the choice to be happy by following these 9 paths to happiness.

1. Honor Yourself: Remember what the flight attendant says, "Put your own oxygen mask on first." You are of no use to anyone else if you have not taken care of your own needs first - this includes your own emotional, as well as physical, well-being.

2. Forgive Everyone For Everything: Forgiveness is a gift to yourself. YOU created the stress in your life by getting angry, and YOU can instantly remove that stress by granting forgiveness. Expressing your forgiveness to the other is optional - internalizing that forgiveness is required in order to live a joyful life. Don't forget to also forgive yourself for everything you regret ever having done or not done.

3. Have Gratitude For All Of Life: As with forgiveness, gratitude is a gift to yourself. Saying "thank you" is a powerful way to create great relationships, but the real power of gratitude is internalizing an immense thankfulness for your very existence - everything that has ever occurred or failed to occur in your life.

4. Respect Your Mind: Faith is powerful, but it is no substitute for observing, paying attention, weighing alternatives, and choosing with intention. Without conscious choice, there is no freedom or happiness.

5. Design Your Future: Don't be a passive tumbleweed blown by the winds of life. Envision the future you want, and then take action to create that future. Often, you will fail. Plan again and take action again.

6. Begin Today, and Never Give Up: There is no better time to begin than today - each and every "today." When obstacles stop you, think of new ways to reach your goals. In the words of the Oriental proverb, "Fall seven times, stand up eight."

7. Be Of Service To Others By Radiating Happiness: Being of service is one of the greatest paths to happiness, but remember that your greatest service to others is the person that you are, rather than the tasks you accomplish. Your greatest gift to others is to give them happiness, and by far the most powerful way to do that is to be an example of happiness and to radiate that happiness to others.

8. Dance Lightly With Life: Life does not have to be a serious undertaking. You will make mistakes, you will feel regrets, and eventually, you will die - so what? Happiness comes from dancing lightly with life - playing hopscotch on the river of life - leaping gracefully from joy to joy while laughing at the threats of calamity - even laughing hysterically at our human frailness when we do fall into the muddy torrent.

9. Know Unity With Spirit: There are as many ways to connect with Spirit as there are people - each of us has our own way to receive strength and serenity from the Infinite. Your life will be happier if you acknowledge that you are not alone, become open to that presence, and create ritual to celebrate your connection. You may feel your bond with Spirit at the Lord's Supper, in Songs of Praise, in Calls to Prayer, in Meditation, while doing Yoga or Qigong, or while walking in the woods. However you connect with Spirit, do it today.

Why We Drank

We drank for happiness and became unhappy.

We drank for joy and became miserable.

We drank for sociability and became argumentative.

We drank for sophistication and became obnoxious.

We drank for friendship and made enemies.

We drank for sleep and awakened without rest.

We drank for strength and felt weak.

We drank “medicinally” and acquired health problems.

We drank for relaxation and got the shakes.

We drank for bravery and became afraid.

We drank for confidence and became doubtful.

We drank to make conversation easier and slurred our speech.

We drank to feel heavenly and ended up feeling like hell.

We drank to forget and were forever haunted.

We drank for freedom and became slaves.

We drank to erase problems and saw them multiply.

We drank to cope with life and invited death.

What's Really Important?

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & .  thAAnkful

that I do my best to just keep things as uncomplicated as possible.  We read and discussed AA's Tradition Five yesterday.  "Each group has but one primary purpose -- to carry the message to the alcoholic who still suffers."  All the peripheral things and the glitter are nice, but when it comes down to it, I have to remember why I'm here.  In another meeting, there were shares about how the newcomer feels at those first few meetings.  It's easy to forget this as time goes by.  But it's vital to remember. 

When I was new to AA, I was in doubt that these people were as sober as they said.  If they were, then maybe they weren't really as alcoholic as me.  I thought that the talk of a Higher Power was bullshit.  Psychic change?  You gotta be kidding. 

Little did I know.

And little do I know now.

Have a great weekend!

Greatness lies, not in being strong, but in the right using of strength;
and strength is not used rightly when it serves only to carry a man above his fellows for his own solitary glory.
He is the greatest whose strength carries up the most hearts by the attraction of his own.

- Henry Ward Beecher

Apparently, I'm a little different.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I step to the beat of a different drummer (I don't dance).  I always have and guess I always will.  So many times in AA meetings, I have heard people talk about feeling different when they were young and growing up.  Well, that applies to me too.  I never fit in with most of the kids my age.  I enjoyed being around adults. 

I wanted to be a teacher as far back as I can remember (age 4 or 5).  I pretended to play teacher at home.  I looked up to my teachers throughout elementary school especially.  I had little or no interest in the other kids. 

Then came puberty and adolesence.  I really felt different.  And I was, but I didn't know how different I was .  I didn't know about the gay concept, but I knew I wasn't the same as the other guys.

Then came drinking and drugs.  They made me feel more like I fit in.  And so on and so on .......

I don't know what got me started on this, but here you have it.

Enjoy your day.

Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.

- William James

attitude, schmattitude

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that my attitude today will guide my happiness today (or lack of it)

for new people, trying to stay sober, who remind me why I'm also trying to stay sober

for those with the courage to save their butts from the disease of alcoholism

that I'm gonna do my best today; join me?

The trick is in what one emphasizes.

We either make ourselves miserable,

or we make ourselves happy.

The amount of work is the same.

- Carlos Castaneda

participating in my own program

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for the benefits from working and practicing Step 4 -- "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."  After doing this with my sponsor, I got 3 immediate results (1) seeing patterns of my thinking (2) seeing patterns of my thinking and (3) seeing patterns of my thinking.

But seriously folks, I now am able to see my part in just about everything that happens in my life. 
I call it my resentment prevention step.

that I'm doing pretty well these days in spite of the fact that I'm not currently working steps with any sponsees.  This is new for me.  Since I began sponsoring people at 1 year sober, I've almost always been working steps with someone.

how AA-speak turns up in most areas of my life.  Of course, most people I am in contact with are AAer's.

 

Appreciation is a wonderful thing.

It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.

- Voltaire

as life continues .......

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for a most peaceful weekend -- no drama at all in my life

for those moments in life that are defining.  For me, a few are (1) the assassination of JFK when I was 9 years old (2) the first moon landing in 1969 when I was 15 (3) when I graduated from college at age 22 (4) when I first stepped foot in the UK in 1989.  Something inside of me told me I was finally home.  (5) when I met Hayden, my partner, in 2002  (6) when I got sober in 2003

I could write a lot about each of those experiences, but I won't.  What are yours?


Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in life has purpose.
There are no mistakes, no coincidences,
all events are blessings given to us to learn from.
- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross