Saturday, March 17, 2012

Happy Paddy's Day ........


Seamus and Paddy were on their way home from the pub, were stumblin up the country road in near darkness,
"Seamus, I think we've stumbled into the graveyard - look, I can see a stone here that says a man lived to 105!"

"Glory be Malarki, was it anybody we knew?"

"No, twas somebody named 'Miles from Dublin'"
  

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.   Looking up to heaven he said, 'Lord take pity on me.   If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!' 
Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, 'Never mind, I found one.'

An Irish priest is driving down to  New York  and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut .   The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?'

'Just water,' says the priest.

The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'

The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'

8 comments:

Mary Christine said...

Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday my dear friend Dave, Happy Birthday to you!!!!

Lou said...

Cute jokes, they made me smile;)

Happy Birthday, Dave, and what about them TIGERS...LOL

Patty said...

Happy Birthday Dave. Enjoyed the funnies today.

ScottF said...

Happy Birthday dAAve!!

I LOVE the Irish Catholic jokes, me friend!!

The Emerson quote is one of my faves!

Debbi said...

Happy birthday dAAve! So happy you're a part of my day.

Syd said...

Happy Birthday, Dave. You have the luck of the HP with you today!

Lulu said...

Happy Birthday! Long time reader of your blog..still laughing at the jokes!

Steve E said...

From across the Gulf of Mexico Dave, Happy Birthday...did not remember that you and Louisey celebrated the same day.