Staying Fit

There.  It's fixed.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I realized only yesterday that I experienced major behavioral changes after I had completed my 9th step.  In addition, as I learn more about the 10th step and keep it in practice, I automatically monitor my own behavior and keep those changes in place.

for faith and hope, without which I have ...  fear

for the ease with which I seem to make friends in my recovery world.  That never rarely happened in my drinking life.

that it no longer matters which side of the bed I wake up on.  What matters is what I do when I get out of bed.

The best way to gain self-confidence
is to do what you are afraid to do.

- Anonymous

no title today

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that my experience tells me that I can stay sober through anything, so far

for AA meetings when we talk about the first 3 steps, fear, and gratitude

to recognize that I'm going into another phase of my sober development; I don't know where it will take me, but I'm ready to go

that my friend, Scott W., had a successful gallery opening on Saturday; he says there were over 700 attendees viewing his wonderful art. Many of you know Scott through his former blog, Attitude of Gratitude.


Gratitude is an attitude that hooks us up to our source of supply.
And the more grateful you are, the closer you become to your maker, to the architect of the universe, to the spiritual core of your being.
- Bob Proctor

Anger

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I've learned, and sometimes remember, how to process anger -- in recovery.

Anger is a form of FEAR. Either I feel threatened about something or I'm afraid I'm going to lose something I already ahve or I'm not going to get something I want.


Once I recognize which direction my fear is coming from, I can begin to let it go.


Anger is like a thorn in the heart.
- Yiddish Proverb

For every minute you remain angry,
you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Anger is often more hurtful than the injury that caused it.
- English Proverb

He who angers you conquers you.
- Elizabeth Kenny

Merry Christmas, Adam & Eve

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for the specialness that is today and tomorrow

that my sobriety has zero tolerance, but my compassion has much (well, it's getting better)

for the little things in life

for Step 10 -- some of my favorite reading is about this step, especially ...
... love and tolerance of others is our code
... continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment and fear
... we have ceased fighting anything or anyone
... alcohol is a subtle foe
... our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness


Every thought we think is creating our future.
- Louise L. Hay

Step 7

I'll post some great! photos of Halloween pumpkins this weekend. Drop by and see 'em.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for those days when I remember to actively practice Steps 6 & 7. We read and discussed Step 7 yesterday. Here's a few of my favorite parts ......

... the attainment of greater humility is the foundation principle of each of A.A.'s Twelve Steps. for without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all.

... never was there enough of what we thought we wanted

... we never thought of making honesty, tolerance, and true love of man and God the daily basis of living.

... The chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear, primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded.

the quote below. My kind of humor.

In order to fly, all one must do is simply miss the ground.
- Douglas Adams

The Promises

This is YOUR lucky day!! click here



todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful for The Promises ...

... If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through (step 9).
... We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
... We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
... We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know a new peace.
... No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
... That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
... We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
... Self-seeking will slip away.
... Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
... Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
... We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
... We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.
- Brian Tracy

The Key Word is *CONTINUE*

senior biker's bar


todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that we read some power writing yesterday morning from pages 84-88 of the Big Book.

... we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes
... it should continue for a lifetime.
... continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment and fear.
... we turn our thoughts to someone we can help.
... love and tolerance is our code.
... we have ceased fighting anything or anyone.
... the problem has been removed.
... we are not cured of alcoholism.
... we have a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.


These ideas are covered in 3 paragraphs. Amazing.


The Promised Land always lies on the other side of a Wilderness.
- Havelock Ellis

Watch your butts

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

we read "Empty on the Inside", an AA story in the 4th edition of the Big Book. I really identify with the author when she writes about never acquiring social and conversational skills. I still don't know how to have a conversation with someone I don't know. I'm afraid to.

for the people who made me feel welcome to the rooms of AA when I first started going to meetings

for a first -- all 3 of my current sponsees were at the same meeting as I
(that was weird because they all have very different schedules)

that I have not been to my favorite watering hole since June 2004 (I wuz 9 months sober)

that I do my best to show respect for others; I see a lot of disrespect and it's very ugly


He deserves paradise who can make his companions laugh.
- The Qur'an

F the 13th

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for the not-so-hidden messages in Step 7 of Alcoholics Anonymous -- "Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."

... we now clearly see that we have been making unreasonable demands upon ourselves, upon others, and upon God.

... the chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear -- primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded.

... Living upon a basis of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual disturbance and frustration.

It tells us that we need to try humility in seeking the removal of our other shortcomings. If I can find the same degree of humility that enabled me to find the grace by which such a deadly obsession (my drinking) could be banished, then there must be hope of the same result respecting any other problem I (we) could possibly have.

What an order! But I can go through with it.

Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.
- John Quincy Adams

for your eyes (only)

Twitter is lighting up at the moment with the uncovering of this video of the Heene family boys, better known to the world as the "balloon family", in which they rap about the "pussification" of American men and boast "I hate gay faggots, I (kill? hit?) 'em with a bat." Or something like that. You judge at the 2:40 mark. Immediately following, the kid unmistakably speaks about throwing a rock at a "faggot" in a tree. These children definitely need to be removed from the custody of their parents.

borrowed from the blog of Joe.My.God.



todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful


that I am my own person, no matter what you think

for self-commitments

for a weekend of perfect weather

that I had the courage to walk through a small fear -- I attended and entered my Riviera in a car show. I went by myself and was there for about 5 hours. There were 253 other entries, so I was kinda lost in the crowd (a good thing). I had a number of compliments on my car, but I also know that it's nowhere near "car show quality". All in all though, I'm glad I did it. And I got really sunburned.


Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers

Literature

(this video has nothing to do with literature, but I think it's kind of funny)


todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that the meetings I attend DO NOT allow excessive talk of Jesus or any particular religion; if they had, I would have run out of those rooms as fast as possible

that we read TIGHTROPE yesterday in the Big Book meeting. It's a story in the 4th edition, page 359. Here's a few excerpts that I really identify with ...

... Alcohol helped me to hide my fears; the ability to converse was an almost miraculous gift to a shy and lonely individual.
... My sponsor was gentle with me. He did not push his opinions on me. He had the sense to see that I was so afraid and so used to being alone that I could not face a "hard sell" approach.
... But once a conversation starts, communication frequently continues.

that I bought a classic Caddy yesterday (on eBay) and will pick it up in a couple of days. Some details on that soon.

Know that you are your greatest enemy, but also your greatest friend.
- Jeremy Taylor

music, smiles, traditions

I am a fan of calypso music, made famous in the USA by Harry Belafonte (click here). If you have time, watch some of his other performances highlighted on the right column of YouTube.


todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I get 3 doses of AA today; it's something I choose to do

that it's rarely painful to walk with a smile on my face

that the only requirement for membership in Alcoholics Anonymous is a desire to stop drinking (fortunately, it doesn't say for how long)

for the early experiences of sober members of AA and that they didn't give up

for a little better understanding that my episodes of intolerance are because of a fear I am experiencing

for the cool temperature brought to us this morning with a powerful weather front


Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity.
- Kahlil Gibran

fear vs courage

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that fear is only paper thin

that many of my fears are only in my head and turn out to be little or nothing at all

that my biggest fear today is that I will stop wanting this good life and allow my thinking to revert to the old days. Because of this, I must constantly stay on top of this thing.

that courage is no longer in a bottle, can or joint


It takes courage to show your dreams to someone else.
- Erma Bombeck

pretty much

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for a first-time newcomer at the noon meeting yesterday

that he joined us at lunch after the meeting; there were 18 of us at lunch at the local cafeteria

that my fears are pretty much under control

that I pretty much know how to handle resentments

that I pretty much feel comfortable around others

for the lovely thunderstorm we had yesterday afternoon; only got a half-inch of rain, but no complaints here


Hope is like a road in the country; there wasn't ever a road, but when many people walk on it, the road comes into existence.
- Lin Yutang

as things become a little clearer

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that more IS revealed, just like you guys told me would happen

that I got to know Bill A. a little bit better when he shared some of his experience, strength and hope yesterday

for the various amounts of hope I receive as a result of being in recovery

that the Energizer Bunny was arrested; he was charged with battery.

Whoever can see through all fear will always be safe.
- Tao Te Ching

cat and mouse

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

for a lively noon AA meeting yesterday. Sometimes, personalities take control over principles, but I can just sit back and watch when I'm not in charge.

that most of my fears may never be removed, but they are mostly manageable

that I have a very comfortable home to spend my time in

that I'm not a fairweather baseball fan, nor a fairweather alcoholic-in-recovery. I work 'em both 24/7.

Create the kind of self you will be happy to live with all your life.
- Foster C. McClellan

It's all about GREEN!

It was Green Day at Minute Maid Park where the Houston Astros play.
I got this nifty green Astros hat.

My life is now complete.


todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I remember what I did last night and to whom I did it

that I shared on group level about one of my isolation triggers and how I tackled it. Basically, I made myself accountable to someone. I shared this in the hope that someone might benefit from my experience even though I felt it made me look very weak-minded. This is new stuff for me.

for the majority of the time when I can have a positive attitude

that I went to the baseball game last night with somone who was afraid to go by himself because he'd never been without drinking -- he did just fine and it was good to see someone tackle one of their fears

that I'm not afraid to try new things usually, except brocolli


There is no one luckier than he who thinks himself so.
-German Proverb

Thoughts on a Monday

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful


for the WE of the program and to be reminded that those who are not in the program cannot possibly understand how important it is

for a slowly increasing knowledge of my fears

for a nice talk with my sponsor

that I don't feel threatened by the act of 2 people practicing heterosexuality

that the bi-annual time change doesn't bother me at all -- I don't even notice it
(I also never get jet lag)


Never miss a chance to keep your mouth shut.
-Robert Newton Peck

gettin' it together

disassembled VW




todAAy i AAM grAAteful & thAAnkful

that fear may be a mile high and a mile wide, but usually it's just paper thin;
thus, I just have to muster the courage to walk through it

that I heard this yesterday -- it doesn't matter if I believe in God or not. He can do His work without my approval.

for all of you who have preceded me and already discovered the things I need to know

for the few who are able to make it back to the rooms of AA

that I haven't (yet) tested my desire to make it back after a relapse


If you can't get a compliment any other way, pay yourself one.
-Mark Twain

Day Two

todAAy i AAM grAAteful & thAAnkful

for a quiet first day of the year

(I am at a loss this morning, so here's something we read yesterday in 12&12 study)
"The chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear -- primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded. Living upon a basis of unsatisfied demands, we were in a state of continual disturbance and frustration. Therefore, we could find no peace unless we could find a means of reducing these demands."
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 76



There is always a certain peace in being what one is, in being that completely.
-Ugo Betti