"My resentments mounted at the realization that I had flushed a career down the drain, disgraced and alienated my family, and been relegated to the meanest of institutions, a skid row shelter. But I was also able to realize that this bonfire of resentment and rage was beckoning me to pick up a drink and plunge in to my death. Then I realized that I had to separate my sobriety from everything else that was going on in my life. No matter what happened or didn't happen, I couldn't drink. In fact, none of these things that I was going through had anything to do with my sobriety; the tides of life flow endlessly for better or worse, both good and bad, and I cannot allow my sobriety to become dependent on these ups and downs of living. Sobriety must live a life of its own."
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, 4th edition, pages 450, 451
I love the concept that sobriety is totally separated from everything that happens in my life. Apples and Oranges. Anytime I drink because something happens, it's just an excuse to drink.
todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful
that we had 2 first-timers at the noon meeting yesterday in addition to the return to the rooms of a person who just relapsed after 5 sober years
that I am always glad when someone returns after a relapse; I am glad for them (of course) and I am glad for me, because they offer such a poingant reminder of the nature of this disease
that the resentments I entered the rooms of AA with are gone / non-existent
that I don't mentally beat myself up as often as I used to
for my bike, which I ride infrequently
for the Professor and Mary Ann
"When you take charge of your life, there is no longer need to ask permission of other people or society at large. When you ask permission, you give someone veto power over your life."
-- Albert F. Geoffrey