to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."
My sponsor (bless his heart) crossed off most of the people on my Step 8 list. He left me with just 3 people to whom I needed to make a direct amends. These were both of my parents and my life-partner. Two would have to be in writing and the amends to my mom would be fact-to-face. As I said, yesterday, I was ready.
He (my sponsor) insisted that he see my written amends before I sent them in case they needed some editing. They did. He reminded me to keep it simple and to the point.
We talked about what I would say to mom. As it turned out, I had a lifetime of neglect and short-tempered outbursts to make amends for. The best I could offer her would be as a living amends to change those behaviors. But I still had to ask her how I could make things right. What would be her suggestions?
When all was said and done, the results were magnificent. My amends were well received by those I loved. Now, a few years down the road, this step changed my life. And made the lives better for those I loved. I was able to be the primary caretaker for my mother during her last 3 years on this planet as she slowly died from a major stroke. I was her attentive son, at her eside when I could be. I never missed seeing her because I was sitting an a bar - drunk.
I am still with my partner. His request to me to not treat him abusively any more is always on my mind. Sometimes, I relapse to my old ways, but those times are a little less each year. I have Step 10 at my disposal when necessary. Next week, we celebrate our 8th year together.
I love Step 9 (in case you couldn't tell).
todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful
for commitment to my recovery design for living
that my friend Marcos shared his story of experience, strength and hope yesterday
that I had the honor to listen to another fifth step yesterday; I'll get to hear another one next week, I think
Then give to the world the best you have, and the best will come back to you.
- Madeline Bridges