Sunday, January 09, 2011

I'm just the messenger ...

1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.

2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.

3. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it -- mainly because it was a sew-sew job.

4. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.

5. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.

6. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it... couldn't cut the mustard.

7. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.

8. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.

9. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.

10. I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.

11. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.

12. So then I got a job in a Workout Center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

13. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it.

14. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.


Syd said...

Good ones Dave. Thanks for the smiles this AM.

Linda said...

I love this blog! Your mixture of humor and sarcasm is terrific. In my blog I stress the issue of humor within the insanity, but you really do it. Thanks for the inspiration. I've added you to the list of blogs I follow.

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

LOL this was a good one, thanks dAAve! ;0)

Scott said...

ooohhh dAAve, dAAve, dAAve what ARE we going to do with you?

How about a big long distance hug and high five, lol

Thanks for the laughs this morning!

Todd HellsKitchen said...

Yer so punny...

Mary Christine said...