Monday, December 05, 2011

Weekend lessons

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAANkful

for the concept of contempt prior to investigation. 
Saturday night, I went to an AA Speaker meeting.  The speaker was awoman in her early-to-mid forties with long black hair.  I didn't know her, but at first glance she looked like somone trying to relive her early twenties.  She talked kind of like a valley girl. 
After about 10 minutes, I was almost ready to get up and leave.  I have only done this once before in a meeting.  Her story was all over the map and hard to follow.  But I remained seated and just listened. 
It got a little more interesting.  By the time she was through an hour later, I was mesmerized.  No need for details, but her message was one of despair followed by hope and action.  She's now 17 years sober and must be a wonderful influence to many young women early in the recovery.
Thank God I'm still willing to learn.

I had an (emotionally) difficult weekend but didn't bother to tell anyone until last night I mentioned it on Facebook (of all places).  I had this terrible feeling of wanting to isolate and to stay away from crowds.  I did not attend 3 parties that I planned to attend.  I felt like I wouldn't be missed and probably wasn't.  I just didn't feel like standing around smiling and trying to be nice.
This too shall pass.  I hope today is better.

Happiness isn't at the end of the rainbow.
Happiness is at the beginning of the rainbow.
Following the rainbow is happiness,
not getting to the end of it.
- Werner Erhard


Pammie said...

We must have been in the same emotional place....we should have called each other!

ScottF said...

Being aware of, and avoiding the practice of that that principle has provided me with many unexpected blessings...

Contempt prior to investigation is definitely a slippery slope.

Syd said...

I understand the feeling of isolating and not being missed. I have felt that a lot over the past few months. But then I remember that this just may be my disease talking. Like you said, it has passed.

Mary Christine said...

I hope today is better. I am thinking that you have made it better already just by sharing this.

Scott W said...

I often have to push myself to attend parties and other social events. Sometimes I am glad I did, other times I would have been better off just staying home. It's all about balance.

I have faith you'll be fine.

Jeremy said...

I hope today is better too! I'm stealing that rainbow quote because I love it!