"Continued to take moral inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it."
For those of us trying to live by the twelve steps, this is part of our daily maintenance. I'm writing this as a reminder to myself what I need to do to maintain my program. Maybe it will serve as a reminder to others, as well.
... Cultivate the habit of self-restraint in order to avoid making amends. When something upsetting occurs, take an hour (at least) to take an inventory of what actually happened and what my role was. (I also use this a resentment prevention)
... Include the things I did right. This may include helping others, taking initiative or being an example of working a strong program of recovery.
... Be on the lookout for self-righteousness and self-justification. Do a spot-check inventory if I feel morally superior or entitled to something.
... Examine my motives -- before -- saying or doing anything for someone else's so-called benefit. Why am I helping? Why am I telling someone about how tough my life was or is?
These are paraphrased from STAYING SOBER, by Meredith Gould, page 124
These barely scratch the surface. But they are a good start to my daily practice of Step 10. Have a great weekend.
The only people to get even with are those who have helped you.