Monday, January 08, 2007

Kicking myself over and over

Julian Beever is a sidewalk / pavement artist.
His work has been seen in numerous locations.
I'll post a few examples of his work this week.

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that I am sober and smoke-free -- I am going through a very, very difficult emotional period, but I know that drinking will not help and I'm not even tempted to drink -- that is a miracle!

that I was finally able to talk to my sponsor about what is bothering me. It's this damn relationship, of course. I don't want to bother anyone about it, and I can't figure out what to do by myself, so I sit and conjure up every negative possibility I can think of, and then some. I know better than to do this, but I do it anyway, so I deserve what I get. Right? Then I feel sorry for myself and the viscious circle continues.

that we had volunteers to fill all open Board positions at Lambda (elections were held Saturday)

for a weekend visit from one of Hayden's best friends from Trinidad

that I got to see Roger Clemens standing in front of me at Starbuck's, waiting for his latte just like a normal human - LOL

Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, and you'll help them to become what they are capable of becoming.


Pam said...

morning dave. oooo I just hate it when I sit alone with something in my head...glad you're talking to someone about helps to shrink it down a little. FYI..I have 4 "normie" friends from Trinidad. I envy your "smoke free" status.

Redhead Gal said...

relationships can be tough, no doubt. But I'm glad you are talking, rather than stewing.

Trudging said...

Cool pic!

recoveryroad said...

I like the pic.

Goethe is one of my fave writers. Faust, anyone?

Glad you feel better.

recoveryroad said...

p.s. how come you never get any spam without word-verification switched on???

tkdjunkie said...

Glad you were finally able to talk with your sponsor ... that seems to be a big step and an important one.

Shannon said...

Good Morning Daave. I am there with you at the moment. Change is what is causing me to feel this way. Dont be so hard on yourself. be honest, and keep checking in with your sponsor if you are befunddeled... that is wht I do.
change is creating fear for me, so my brain is attacking me as MC would say
We are all human.
We (alcohlics) are sensitive
also we are not good at relationships. All we can do it the best we can, and make ammends if needed


I'm sorry you are having a rough time of it emotional but I'm glad you talked to your sponsor. Sometimes I can't pinpoint what it is that is bothering me but I'm glad you can.
Roger Clemens...normal? Holy cow...I think NY is going to sign him for a year.

BigSkymAAck said...

It seems the worse problems I have had in sobriety is relationships. I could let them get the best of me and then just send it spinning in my head. Talking to a sponsor seemed to help. If for nothing else just to slow me down. I am sure that I have had bigger problems in sobriety but you explanation hit home for me.

The photo is great. I have seen some of this guys work on the net he is really good.

piglet said...

my most insane days sober have been at the expense of relationships.
mainly, healthy relationships. i have no clue (i am learning...) i knew how to do bad relationships and i knew how to run...

this is a good sign you are healthy :) specially if you're completely lost :)

you are soooooo lovable !!!!


Anonymous said...

HI Daave..I am back online.
Missed the blogsphere and friends too much.I will be cutting back my blogging time though..just makes my blogging time more qaulity time when I can visit and share .
Leave it to LOVE to make you feel a little crazy inside.Its part of the process of letting go I think?
I love your honesty and I trust you will do what is best for you
for today in dealing with the uneasy stuff.Thanks for sharing.
Come on by to visit me sometime at my newish blog...still working on this new version! urgh.
Love Tab xo

Todd in H.K. (formerly Mr. H.K.) said...

Thoughts and prayers....

Noor Azman Othman GBE said...

Just happened to be in the neighbourhood. I got a lot in my mind but no one to turn to. So I'm just wandering around from blog to blog.

Your most humble servant from Malaysia

Carly said...

Who's Roger Clemens? (I'm not kidding. Never heard of him.)