Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Just me

todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

that while it may take a few times for me to really hear something I need to hear, it finally happens when it needs to.  A number of times this has been true since I got sober.
I've read the 4th edition of the big book several times, front to back.  Including the stories.  Yesterday, my 6:30am group read "Student Of Life" starting on page 319.  The writer describes her drinking in this fashion:

"When I was drinking, I was okay.  I understood.  Everything made sense.  I could dance, talk, and enjoy being in my own skin.  It was as if I had been an unfinished jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing:  as soon as I took a drink, the last piece instantly and effortlessly snapped into place."

Damn, that was me!  I have never been able to accurately put into words what getting drunk did for me.  But that's just what it did for me.  I became a different person.  Someone I liked.

Since getting sober, I've had to use the steps to learn how to live sober and happy.  To be comfortable in my own skin. 

AA works for me as long as I work for it.  Have a lovely day, y'all.

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else;
you are the one who gets burned.
- The Buddha


Mary Christine said...

Or as some other sage put it: Drinking wasn't my problem, it was my solution - until THAT became my problem.

tjmiller said...

Made me feel like I fit in, belonged or was part of something.

April said...

Someone just read that quote in one of my meetings last week. I had never heard it before. Maybe someone is trying to tell me something??? :) Really enjoying your blog - glad I stumbled upon it!

Syd said...

That missing piece--it is a hole that only God can fill. Good stuff, Dave.