"Our first objective will be the development of self-restraint. This carries a top priority rating. When we speak or act hastily or rashly, the ability to be fair-minded and willful snap judgement can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year. Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen. We must avoid quick-tempered criticism and furious, power-driven argument. The same goes for sulking or silent scorn. These are emotional booby traps baited with pride and vengefulness. Our first job is to sidestep the traps. When we are tempted by the bait, we should train ourselves to step back and think. For we can neither think nor act to good purpose until the habit of self-restraint has become automatic."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, Step 10, page 91
For this old boy, restraint has meant a life-changing world for me. It means I don't go around pissing people off. It means I don't have to apologize to people for yelling at them or calling them names (whether they deserve it or not). The reason I don't have to apologize is because I Just Do Not Engage In That Behavior Anymore.
3 comments:
That has been a hard thing for me to learn. Though I am getting much better at it.
I see you,
JJ
Thanks for this post! A great issue to think about on a Sunday in preparation for the work week ahead...
A definite attribute in the Plays Well With Others category...
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, 'ol Texas Dave...
My goal is to never make another amends - but I have not achieved perfection yet.
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