Friday, December 18, 2009

for this Friday morning ...

It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.

Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."


Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."

Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."

Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.


Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."

Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."

Johnny is even madder than before.


Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."

Teacher: "That's right Nancy , you may also leave."

Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.

When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"

The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"

Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"




todAAy i AAm grAAteful & thAAnkful

from page 31 of the Big Book, "Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic."
I would never want to be a normal drinker. That would take all the fun out of it.

to remember how sensitive I am and not to over-react to most of my perceptions

for the oh, so many times that my recovery program seems to work me

that my magnifying mind has settled down a bit from "the good old days"

Ingenuity plus courage plus work equals miracles.
- Bob Richards

9 comments:

Kim A. said...

::snicker, snortle:: love the joke and the gratitude...

Namaste

Mary Christine said...

Poor Tiger.

And I will never understand the concept of normal drinking - why bother?

Scott W said...

Ego maniacs with inferiority complexes explains so much!

Tall Kay said...

Are you talking about me being sensitive?? No...I guess not :o)

Todd HellsKitchen said...

Have a great Friday, pal!

The Turning Point said...

After listening to the "stories" while hanging around the halls in AA I'm yet to meet a self proclaimed .. normal!..drinking or sober guy/gal in AA It's beyond me how any of these same creatures could consider or admit to being God forbid ..normal..drinkers.

JF

~ Tabitha ~ said...

xo

Syd said...

Poor old Tiger. I'm glad that you weren't one of the notches on his driver

garden-variety drunk said...

"to remember how sensitive I am and not to over-react to most of my perceptions"
-thanks for the reminder. i really need to stop taking the nonsense my mind tells me so seriously. down, magnifying mind, down. good....