Saturday, June 30, 2012

Redneck Medical Dictionary

Rednecks have the lowest stress rate because they do not take medical terminology seriously.

Medical Term : Redneck Definition

Artery:  The study of paintings

Bacteria:  Back door to cafeteria

Barium:  What doctors do when patients die

Benign:  What you be, after you be eight

Caesarean Section:  A neighborhood in Rome

Cat scan:  Searching for Kitty

Cauterize:  Made eye contact with her

Colic:  A sheep dog

Coma:  A punctuation mark

Dilate:  To live long

Enema:  Not a friend

Fester:  Quicker than someone else

Fibula:  A small lie

Impotent:  Distinguished, well known

Labor Pain:  Getting hurt at work

Medical Staff:  A Doctor's cane

Morbid:  A higher offer

Nitrates:  Rates of Pay for Working at Night, Normally more money than Days

Node:  I knew it

Outpatient:  A person who has fainted

Pelvis:  Second cousin to Elvis

Post Operative:  A letter carrier

Recovery Room:  Place to do upholstery

Rectum:  Nearly killed him

Secretion:  Hiding something

Seizure:  Roman Emperor

Tablet:  A small table

Terminal Illness:  Getting sick at the airport

Tumor: One plus one more

Urine:  Opposite of you're out


Mary Christine said...

Wow. My class years ago in medical terminology had it all wrong!

Syd said...

Pretty funny stuff. I know those who think these things.